Through the Wire

Contributors: Linda Moss, Ted Hearn.

FX’s Denis Leary Torches Ex-ABC Duo

Anyone interested in a master’s course on burning bridges should get transcripts of the Television Critics Association presentation for Rescue Me, the upcoming drama on FX written by comic Denis Leary and partner Peter Tolan, the latter a veteran of The Larry Sanders Show.

While promoting their new project at the Los Angeles gathering, they launched into an obscenity-laden tirade against their former masters at ABC, naming names and insulting parentage.

Leary and Tolan were responsible for The Job, a critically liked but short-lived series that never found a permanent time slot with the broadcaster. They singled out former programming executives Lloyd Braun and Susan Lyne for the bulk of their obscene ire, with Tolan stating he’d vowed to never do television again after their ABC experience.

Leary said FX was “below his radar” as a possible home for his new series, until he realized he knew what night and time The Shield was on even though he didn’t watch the show.

“You couldn’t go anywhere in New York without seeing f_____g [Michael] Chiklis everywhere,” he said, referring to The Shield’s star, featured prominently in the launch promotion. “I was impressed by that.”

Leary and Tolan like their new network. “Even when they’re a pain in the ass, [FX CEO Peter] Liguori and [entertainment chief John] Landgraf come up with great f______g ideas,” Leary said.

The pair also dealt with critics’ criticism of a series theme that firefighters got more sexual propositions after 9/11. Leary countered with an anecdote: An actor in the series, made up for a scene in which he’s decapitated, went in costume to a nearby shop for smokes and candy. The girl behind the counter said she loved firemen and gave him her number. “First, he’s a fake fireman. Second, his head’s been severed. But he’s still getting numbers!” Leary said, with an “I rest my case” shrug.

A Grave Setting For Showtime Do

Showtime Networks Inc. surely gave a party that will long be remembered by TV writers. We can state with all surety that we’ve never bopped our heads to electronica while nibbling primo grub in a cemetery before last week.

The premium channel took over a mausoleum and a neighboring lawn as the venue for its Dead Like Me-themed party at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery. Apparently, the cemetery hosts lots of nonfunereal events, like al fresco movie-watching parties for picnickers or visits by Graveline Tours.

But the venue left the writers veering between, “My, what an interesting choice. Let’s find Rudolph Valentino’s grave!” and “We’re all going to hell for this!”

It went from creepy to tacky when the entertainment arrived shortly before the party’s end. Out marched fire eaters and stilt walkers, dressed in skimpy, quasi-military garb that made them look like they had daytime gigs delivering strip-o-grams. They gobbled and tottered to the strains of patriotic ballads before the gaping crowd. On the bus back to the hotel, the reaction of the writers — punchy after too many days of too much input — was hilarious. One wag dubbed fiery femme fatales as the “Tails from the Crypt.”

“That’s what happens when they let straight people plan parties,” another quipped.

Gerry’s Got Her Spectacles Back

When Oxygen Media chairman Gerry Laybourne appeared on stage wearing sunglasses at the Cable & Telecommunications Association for Marketing Summit last week in Boston, she immediately explained that she wasn’t trying to adopt the theme of the show: dark glasses on everyone from the baby that was the show’s mascot to execs involved with the event. Even Insight Communications Co. CEO Michael Willner had appeared onstage in shades.

No, Laybourne — in the house to greet Oxygen co-investor and Boston Red Sox owner Tom Werner — explained she was wearing sunglasses because she had just left her regular glasses in a cab.

“And if any of you, when you are in a white taxi cab and you have a very crabby driver, will you ask him if he found a set of titanium rimless glasses in a black case?” Laybourne asked the audience. “The man I am about to introduce, Tom Werner, will give you owner’s tickets to the Red Sox game. You can just e-mail me at [address deleted] and I will get it on my Blackberry and retrieve my glasses.”

As it turned out, the crabby cabby was actually a kind sweetheart. Unbeknownst to Laybourne while she was speaking, the hack had already returned her glasses to the Four Seasons, where he had picked her up.

Only in Boston, kids, only in Boston.

Oh Gene, Gene, He’s Kerry’s Fan

Consumers Union is supposed to be nonpartisan. But that hasn’t stopped notorious cable nag Gene Kimmelman, CU’s senior director of public policy, from expressing his partisan interests with his checkbook. In March, Kimmelman kicked in $500 to the Kerry presidential campaign, according to the Federal Election Commission.

“This is a personal contribution from my family; has nothing to do [with] my job or Consumers Union, which is nonpartisan and doesn’t endorse or contribute to politicians/political parties. AND it isn’t the first time I’ve given money to people running for public office,” Kimmelman said via e-mail.

FCC records show Kimmelman donated $300 to the New Mexico Democratic Senate campaign of former Federal Communications Commissioner Gloria Tristani in March 2000, and $1,000 to the Democratic National Committee from 2000 to 2002.

The Kerry donation was interesting. In 1992, Kerry offered an amendment that would have softened the blow of pending cable regulation legislation. Kerry proposed no rate regulation of expanded basic and no program access rules. Regarding Kerry’s attempt to assist cable, Kimmelman told Multichannel News in February 2004, “Sen. Kerry was not helpful to consumers in that battle.”

A Kerry Sighting In NECTA Halls

You’ve got to concede that the New England Cable & Telecommunications Association convention has more than a little cachet when you see Kerry quits the campaign trail to spend a day at the industry gathering last week in Newport, R.I.

OK, it wasn’t Democratic president candidate Sen. John Kerry (D-Mass.). It was Cameron Kerry, the White House aspirant’s younger brother, who’s a cable attorney in the Boston office of Mintz, Levin, Cohn, Ferris, Glovsky & Popeo.

Kerry, considered one of his brother’s closest advisers, said he had to take a break from the campaign because “I had some clients who wanted me here.”